Stronger than the Struggle Uncomplicating Your Spiritual Battle By Havilah Cunnington {Book Review}

Disclosure: I received a copy of this book from the publisher for the purpose of this review. All opinions remain my own and weren’t influenced. My opinions may differ from those of others as well as the author/publisher. Some of the links on the following page are “affiliate links” and I may be compensated if you click on these links.


Why do I still struggle if I’m faithfully following God?”

We all face challenges. On any given day, the problems of real life can take our breaths away. Our marriages, finances, relationships, and health are regular struggles, and that’s just the beginning. Doesn’t the Bible say the war has already been won? So why do we still battle?

In a down-to-earth, let’s-get-real approach, popular Bible teacher Havilah Cunnington cuts through the confusion and shows us how to
*Discern whether we’re dealing with battles within ourselves, resistance from God, or genuine fights with the Devil.
*Throw off misconceptions about spiritual warfare, and understand what Jesus really said about our spiritual authority and the certainty we have in him.
*Ask the right questions and build a realistic battle plan to win one day at a time.

With humor and honesty, Cunnington lays out practical tools to thrive in the face of hardship, enabling us to walk forward in the confidence that, because of Jesus, we really are stronger than the struggle.

My Thoughts!

We all face spiritual battles and sometimes that can take over and set in more doubt than necessary. Luckily, this book will help you face those battles and take them head on. It’s well written and provides insight that words can’t even describe. I love that each chapter offers empowerment points, which summarizes the chapter and gives you some reflective points. I love that it takes the complication out of things. I definitely recommend this read to others!


Purchase It!


Hurry on over to Amazon to grab this book! *Remember that Amazon pricing is subject to change at any time with or without notice.  Please double check pricing before purchasing.

Amish Sweethearts By Amy Clipston {Book Review}

Disclosure: I received a copy of this book from the publisher for the purpose of this review. All opinions remain my own and weren’t influenced. My opinions may differ from those of others as well as the author/publisher. Some of the links on the following page are “affiliate links” and I may be compensated if you click on these links.


Love is in the air in these four sweet romances!

Love and Buggy Rides (previously published in An Amish Harvest)

Janie Lantz is a cashier at Lancaster Souvenirs and Buggy Rides, where Jonathan Stoltfuz is a buggy driver. A frightening accident brings Janie and Jonathan together in a blossoming friendship, yet daunting obstacles stand between them and something deeper. Can love kindle into flames that burn away fear and regret—and lead them to a life together?

A Home for Lindsay

From Amy Clipston’s beloved Kauffman Amish Bakery series comes Lindsay Bedford’s story. Lindsay is happily looking forward to the day she becomes Matthew Glick’s wife and is excited for the plans he has for the house he will build her. So, when Matthew suddenly calls off the wedding, she is blindsided. She knows there is more to the story than what he is telling her, but will he open up and let her in on his own heartbreak?

Where the Heart Is

Tobias Smucker is back home, and it’s no secret he and his father are still not on the best of terms. But what is surprising is that his little sister’s best friend, Mariella, has been harboring her own secret feelings for Tobias. With her help, he begins to unravel a family mystery and learns that everyone has their own hidden depths, including his father.

Love Birds (previously published in An Amish Market)

While Ellie Lapp and her mother are still mourning the loss of her brother, Seth, Ellie starts working at one of the gift shops in town. Seth’s friend Lloyd is talented at carving wooden birds, but his father disapproves and expects him to take over the family farm someday. Ellie sees the beauty in Lloyd’s creations and insists Lloyd sell the birds in the gift shop where she works. As Ellie and Lloyd spend more time together, they begin to develop feelings for one another, but she accidentally betrays his trust. Will she lose any hope of a future with him?

My Thoughts!

I’ve fallen in love with Amish reads lately. Clipston did an amazing job at bringing these stories to life and building her characters. I love that the characters were well developed and relatable. It made the stories easy to read and follow. I could envision the stories as if I were actually there. Each story was unique and fun to read. I love the family tree because it helps provide a bigger picture of who is who. This book was a fast read for me. It offered a steady pace, romance, and some drama. It’s hard to choose a favorite story, but if I absolutely had to it would be Where the Heart Is. Though, they were all magnificent. I highly recommend this book!

Purchase It!

Hurry on over to Amazon to grab this book! *Remember that Amazon pricing is subject to change at any time with or without notice.  Please double check pricing before purchasing.

Get $3 when you sign up for Swagbucks in February!

Disclosure of Material Connection:
Some of the links on the following page are “affiliate links” and I may be compensated if you click on these links.

Want an extra boost to your budget in February??

If you haven’t tried Swagbucks before, you can get a bonus $3 for signing up as my referral this month. Swagbucks is a rewards site where you earn points (called SB) for things you’re probably doing online already, like searching, watching videos, discovering deals, and taking surveys. Then you take those points and exchange them for gift cards to places like Amazon, Starbucks, Walmart, Target, or PayPal cash.

When you sign up through me this month, you can earn a $3 bonus! Here’s how:

1. Sign up using this link

2. Earn 300 SB total before 3/1/18. You’ll get a $3 (300 SB) bonus for it!

3. If you want even more bonuses, you’ll get a $10 (1000 SB rebate) bonus for making your first shop purchase! That’s in addition to the SB you earn for every dollar you spend. 


New To Swagbucks?

If you haven’t heard of Swagbucks, it’s a site that rewards you for online activities that you’re already doing. You collect points then redeem those points for gift cards to places like Amazon, PayPal, Starbucks, Walmart, Target, and more!
Swagbucks is totally legit. I use it myself on a daily basis to earn money that I save up for Christmas, birthdays and date nights! 

The Chalk Man By C.J. Tudor {Book Review}

Disclosure: I received a copy of this book from the publisher for the purpose of this review. All opinions remain my own and weren’t influenced. My opinions may differ from those of others as well as the author/publisher. Some of the links on the following page are “affiliate links” and I may be compensated if you click on these links.



In 1986, Eddie and his friends are just kids on the verge of adolescence. They spend their days biking around their sleepy English village and looking for any taste of excitement they can get. The chalk men are their secret code: little chalk stick figures they leave for one another as messages only they can understand. But then a mysterious chalk man leads them right to a dismembered body, and nothing is ever the same.
In 2016, Eddie is fully grown, and thinks he’s put his past behind him. But then he gets a letter in the mail, containing a single chalk stick figure. When it turns out that his friends got the same message, they think it could be a prank . . . until one of them turns up dead. That’s when Eddie realizes that saving himself means finally figuring out what really happened all those years ago.


My Thoughts!

This suspense novel is one for the books! I loved every minute of it and thoroughly enjoyed Tudor’s writing style.  It was well written and easy to follow. It’s fast paced and  the characters are well developed. I love that they were relatable and unique. This book offered some darkness,  unexpected twists, and flashbacks that will keep you flipping through the pages. The flashbacks are seamless and easy to follow. I love that I didn’t get lost with them or feel like I was missing parts of the story.  I would recommend it to others, though I’d say it’s more appropriate for young adults.


Purchase It!

Hurry on over to Amazon to grab this book! *Remember that Amazon pricing is subject to change at any time with or without notice.  Please double check pricing before purchasing.

Disney Live! Mickey and Minnie’s Doorway To Magic Coming to Chattanooga!

Open the door to reveal mesmerizing worlds of unforgettable Disney moments and grand illusions with Disney Live! Mickey and Minnie’s Doorway to Magic! Join Mickey Mouse, Minnie Mouse and the comical duo of Donald and Goofy as 25 of your favorite characters surprise and captivate at every turn of the knob! See the Fairy Godmother transform Cinderella’s rags into a beautiful ball gown in a split second; the Toy Story gang defy the dimensions of Andy’s toy box with the help of the green army men; and the spectacular stage debut of Rapunzel and Flynn Rider as they rise into the sky amidst the floating lanterns. With special appearances by Snow White, Tinker Bell and Aladdin’s Genie, you never know what to expect or who might join in the fun. In Disney Live! Mickey and Minnie’s Doorway to Magic you hold the ultimate key to unlocking your imagination.


February 16, 2018 at 3:00 PM
February 16, 2018 at 7:00 PM

Purchase tickets!

Purchase your tickets by visiting Disney Live online , by phone at 423-266-6627, or at the McKenzie arena box office.  Ticket pricing starts at $15. Save $5 on your purchase by using coupon code MOM5 online


Disney Live website
Disney Live Facebook
Disney Live Twitter
Disney Live Instagram
Disney Live YouTube


2 lucky TCMS readers will each win a family 4 pack of tickets! Winners will be drawn on February 2 and February 9.
Winners will be contacted via email and will have 24 hours to respond to claim their prize.

Simply comment below with your favorite character!

Can’t Sleep? What A Surprise!



When was the last time you had a good night’s sleep? Being a mom means trading in your good night’s sleep for the next 13 or so years normally. But if you’ve had a baby that hasn’t slept through the night for many years, and then another one came along (just in time for your first baby to sleep through the night), you have learnt how to function with little sleep, especially after your time in hospital where you either wanted the baby out of you yesterday or you just needed some sleep, even five minutes! We all have to function without sleep from time to time, but is this really the best way? And what are the impacts of a lack of sleep on our overall health?


How We View Sleep

Whichever way you turn, people brag about functioning on very little sleep. But we all know, especially as parents, those people haven’t had to get up numerous times during the night, and then have to function all day. But these people who brag about the lack of sleep prowess are more than likely to have a lie-in on the weekend! And you get it in the neck from other parents too, if you had 6 hours uninterrupted sleep, it’s considered a good night. But we all know the figures; you need between 7 and 9 hours of sleep at night! We all differ, but we look at sleep as something that almost gets in the way of our daily lives. But sleep is not just important for our body, it’s important for our brains also.


The Impact Of Little Sleep

While we all know the feeling of fogginess when we’ve had a rough night, it’s important to know what lack of sleep over time really does to you. To ram the point home, sleep deprivation has been a contributing factor to some of the biggest disasters in recent memory. From Chernobyl to the Three Mile Island nuclear accident, to the Exxon Valdez oil spill. You might think that you don’t have a responsibility nowhere near as important as these people who caused these major catastrophes, but think about the things you do on a daily basis that are potentially dangerous. Driving is one of those things that we all take for granted and we do function on autopilot a lot of the time. All it takes is for you to feel particularly sluggish one day, and someone else to not look where they’re going, and a major accident could happen. And if you cause a major accident, then you’d better have an experienced injury and accident lawyer fighting your corner! In America, 1550 crash-related deaths are caused by driver fatigue. And remember, driving drowsy has as much of an impact on your reaction time as if you were driving drunk! Even having two hours less sleep than the recommended amount every day for two weeks is the equivalent of having stayed up for 48 hours straight. Not to mention the fact that sleep has an impact on your mental outlook, but also puts you at risk for heart failure, diabetes, stroke, and the list goes on! So, now don’t you think it’s time to get a good night’s sleep?


How Can We Get A Good Night’s Sleep?

Now that you know the impact of having so little sleep, it’s time to address this. The first thing to look at is your lifestyle. When you have so little sleep, naturally your body craves sugar and the means to stay awake. This means excessive sweet treats, as well as pints of caffeine. But, here is the hard bit, try to stay away from caffeinated drinks after 2 p.m.! Because caffeine stays in your system for 12 hours, depending on your sensitivity to caffeine, this is going to disrupt your sleep. When it comes to eating anything sugary, or anything, in fact, make sure that you eat everything 2 hours before bedtime. Because the temptation is to go to sleep as soon as your child is asleep, you may find this is just after you’ve eaten something. So instead, it’s better to not eat anything after a certain time just to be on the safe side, but don’t undereat! Stick to water, but keep it minimal, because you don’t want to be getting up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom! If this is stuff you already do, it’s time to dig a bit deeper. First of all, do you look at your smartphone in bed? If so, and you can’t tear yourself away from it, you need to invest in a blue light filter. The blue light being emitted from every phone or television device disrupts our sleep hormone, melatonin.


So if you find yourself glued to your phone all day, and all night, it’s time to start banishing the phone from the bedroom. It will have an impact on your ability to nap during the day, and if there’s a window for you to nap, then it’s recommended that you take this opportunity! But we all feel that a nap is a waste of time in our busy schedule. This is far from the case, a short nap, around 20 minutes, has been known to have a positive impact on our reaction times. But the worry about falling into a deep sleep means that we can wake up feeling sluggish, especially if we do end up too far into our sleep cycle. But the one way to counteract this is to have what they call a caffeine nap, whereby you have some caffeine and go for a nap! As the caffeine takes 20 minutes to hit your system, you will wake up feeling more refreshed having had a nap, but also energized due to the caffeine.


Get To Sleep!

Sleep has had a bad rap, and we can feel bad if we have to sleep during the day, or we can be perceived as being weak, but the fact is that if your body is telling you that you need rest, then take it! If you have children that don’t sleep, you’ve got to make some priorities, so you can rest. It’s for the benefit of you and your family that you have a good night’s sleep, so start to think about how you can do this!


The Ultimate Guide To Starting A Design Company From Home

People with a creative mind are often laughed at for ‘out there’ ideas and a flair for the colourful, but the thing is, if you have a creative mind and a strong sense of business, you could be a force to be reckoned with. Working in interior design isn’t just flipping through catalogues and choosing pretty curtains to match carpets. If you think it’s all feeling fabrics and twirling colour charts, then you’ve got a hefty wake up call coming your way. You have to have a very good head for business on your creative shoulders, and if you can only grasp the creative side then you are not ready to have a business of your own. You have to be able to develop a design around what your client wants – even if it isn’t to your own personal taste – and you have to do that within a budget. While you’re busy sketching out interiors and thinking about the appropriate furnishings, you also have to be making quick calculations to ensure your client can afford the vision that you put forward to them. Some experience in design is always appreciated before you kick your own design business off, as then you can get recommendations from people that you have worked with before. Working in interior design is a tough job, but what’s even tougher is striking out on your own and working for yourself.

Image Source

When you have children, going out and commuting to work and spending eight hours a day earning money for someone else becomes quite difficult. Not only have you got to think about childcare and the costs associated with that, you also have to split yourself in two and give half of yourself to your job and half of yourself to your home. It can often feel draining, especially if you are working in the interior design industry. You need to be able to work for other people, take on the vision of someone else and bring their idea under budget and before a deadline, and that kind of stress when working for someone else can become too much. So, why not consider opening your own interior design company? Interior designers need to have both a technical and creative skillset and as a parent, you have a unique set of skills in time management learned purely from within the home. You are an ideal candidate for starting up a home business in interior design, because you need to work around the children and you can do that from home. Sure, you may still need to rely on childcare from time to time, but the hours are not as rigid as if you were working for a company in the city. The education and qualifications that you have achieved combined with the knowledge of budgeting and safety give you the result of a space that can intrigue and inspire, which is exactly what you want to be able to market to your future clients.

The first thing that you need to know about starting your own interior design company, is that no one is ever completely ready to get started without risk. It sounds counterproductive, but if every business leader in the design world knew exactly the right time to start up, there would never be a failed business! There is plenty of risk in starting any business, not just in design, but there are situations where the risk is lower than at other times. For example, you are at less of a risk starting your own business when:

  • Your family isn’t relying on your income, so you can start your own business at any time.
  • You have a nest egg of savings to support you while you build your initial client base.
  • You already work for some clients in your free time on the side of your regular job, so you can pick up paid work from them.

Image Source

A lot of interior businesses take a lot of graft to get going and don’t truly get rolling until year 2 or 3, which is something that you should anticipate when you set things up. Starting a design company is stressful and takes up an awful lot of your time, and you should be prepared for that when you get going. You may have a hefty schedule, but with a lot of persistence, you can get past those initial tough months. Setting up your office, hiring in your staff and looking to for your interior design software take some time. You’ll be incorporating all of this into your business plan and should – where possible – try to follow that plan to the letter. It may be hard work, but hard work that’s for your own business comes with a flexible schedule around your family and no commute – which is always a bonus. When you work for yourself you get to work hard in a job that you adore, but you also get to play hard as you earn every single piece of time off and every dollar. If you want your design business to run from your home, then you need to ensure you’re not going to be procrastinating and wanting to spend time with family instead. Family around the home while you’re working can be very distracting and being an entrepreneur won’t be for you if you can’t manage to focus.

Image Source

As a creative entrepreneur, you’ll have to inventory your skillset. You need to be sure that you can compete with the hundreds of other businesses in your industry; they are your competition and if you can’t face the question, then you need to rethink your own business. Interior design as an industry is brutal and there’s no getting away from that. Clients will be honest about whether your work is to their taste, and sometimes you can get clients that don’t even know what they truly want. It’s going to be frustrating and hard work, but assessing whether your skills are up to the challenge is a must if you hope to succeed. As an entrepreneur, you have to take every opportunity that you can to better yourself. If you see tutorials and classes available, take the chance of an education while you can. Hone your skills, gain extra accolades and accreditations and ask people you trust for their opinion on your work. A thick skin is needed in this game, and you can be a success if you open yourself to it.

To be able to dominate the industry, you have to work out what your business niche is and hone in on that. You need to be able to talk positively about your business and learn how to deal with clients that are difficult. Think about the words that you use to define your business and build your business image around that. Once you can do that, you can define the ideal projects that you would like to work on, as well as market yourself to the ideal clients (hello, money!) and plug, plug, plug away at getting your name out there. You need to work tirelessly to get your name out into the freelance world so that someone out there will pick you. For every job that you pick up, make sure that you get a reference afterwards.

Your company website has to be completely on point, modern and lean toward your design style. If you are loving the minimalist look, make your website reflect that. Your social media activity should be very heavy, especially if you are starting out, as you need to be able to be reached by everyone from every avenue. Your company needs to be on the map and the best way to reach out beyond the local community is to capitalise on your social media websites and take control of your traffic. Start a design blog and hire in a team to help you push your marketing plans to fruition. The whole goal here is to gain a positive, professional reputation while making cash. And all the while, balancing your family and your home life. Hey, no one said this would be easy.

Before you even open your business doors, you need to put together your portfolio and set your prices. You need to know what you plan to offer people before you are offering it, and that way you can answer any questions put forward to you as you get them. It’s not uncommon to feel fear when it comes to actually getting out there and gathering your clients. You’ve put in all the groundwork with social media and your business, and now you have to get up and get out there! Practice picking up the phone and canvassing for business. Practice what you may say and get confident saying it to thin air. Once you’re confident, get on the phone. You’ve put in the money and you’ve spent hours slogging over the website and the business plan; now is the time to rake in the cash. You’ve got this!


Are You Having Trouble Bringing Your Family Together



All families are different, and for some, it can be hard to get everyone together having a good time. This is usually because of a clash of interests, a clash of personalities, or just everyone’s availability. If you’re a busy parent, having the time and money for days out with the kids isn’t as simple as just getting in your car and going, you have work to think about and prepare for. It’s important to note that family time is vital if you’re looking for close bonds, and you’re a lot less likely to keep within the same wavelengths the more time you spend apart. Some families have set plans and traditions in place where they meet up once a week or so, and continue to do so for all of their lives; others barely stay in contact upon moving out as they grow up.




It’s really not uncommon for people to disagree on things, and it can cause severe issues when it comes to families. When there’s emotional pain, it’s much more painful when it comes from a loved one, and can often end up in long-term grudges against one another. It’s because of things like this that families can find it difficult to get back together, which is why it’s important that you seek professional help. Getting your family into a family dispute resolution system can really help you to sort out your differences, and encourages understanding among everyone. You should be going in with an open mind if you want the best results, and you have to be ready to forgive; else you may lose your chances to fix everything.




Encouraging bonding time is a key part of creating a tight-knit family. If you want everyone to get along better, having the time to adjust and learn everyone’s individual quirks and feelings is the best way forward. You just need to know what way you should approach them, as it can vary significantly depending on ages. A great example would be going on vacation with everyone; it’s a difficult task when trying to avoid everyone’s schedules, but it’s definitely achievable. Make sure to keep the needs of everyone in mind when you’re booking it, and possibly even try to get others in on the planning, this way you have a diverse set of opinions to book the perfect escape.


(Source: Pexels)


If you can, try to take the road option for as long as possible, as road trips offer a great amount of time for everyone to communicate. No one can leave, no one can change the plans, and everyone is doing their best to get along and keep the atmosphere light; the perfect opportunity!


If your family isn’t already close when it comes to bonding, then you need to make the time and almost force special bonding events. Whether it’s a couple times a week, a couple times a month, or however much suits everyone; family time is important. Those who don’t have that kind of chance and bond really are missing out on great experiences, as there’s nothing closer than family when it comes to relationships.


Swagbucks: The first Swago: Shopping Edition of 2018!

Disclosure of Material Connection:
Some of the links on the following page are “affiliate links” and I may be compensated if you click on these links.


Still recovering from all of your holiday shopping? The online rewards site Swagbucks has a smart and fun way for you to earn and save when you spend.

Swagbucks is hosting another round of Shopping Swago! What is SWAGO you ask? It’s a bingo-inspired promotion run by Swagbucks, a website that rewards you with points (called SB) for completing everyday online activities. You can redeem those SB for free gift cards. If you’ve never used Swagbucks, participating in SWAGO is a great introduction to the site and an easy way to earn a good amount of points quickly.

Click here to get started!

Here’s what you need to know to get your 300 SB Bonus (and don’t worry, you don’t have to make a purchase to complete a pattern):

  • Go to the Swag page and make sure you hit “Join” otherwise you won’t get credit for completing the action items. Each square on your Swago Board will contain an action item to complete.
  • Once you complete the action item in a particular square the square will change color signifying the action item is complete.
  • You have a limited amount of time to mark off as many squares as possible so use your time wisely.
  • Be mindful of the patterns and their corresponding bonuses located on the right of your Swago Board. The patterns will vary in difficulty and bonus value – up to 300 SB – enough for your first $3 gift card.
  • Once you’ve achieved a pattern the corresponding “Submit” button will light up. You can have multiple patterns available for submission, however, you can only submit ONE pattern so choose wisely.
  • The game ends Friday, January 26th at 12pm PDT/3pm EDT. So make sure to hit “Submit” on the pattern you wish to submit. If you don’t hit “Submit” before the game ends you won’t receive your SB bonus.

    Also, if you sign up through me this month, you’ll get a $10 rebate when you make your first purchase via Swagbucks Shopping! You can activate it in the “Swag Ups” area of “My Account”


New To Swagbucks?

If you haven’t heard of Swagbucks, it’s a site that rewards you for online activities that you’re already doing. You collect points then redeem those points for gift cards to places like Amazon, PayPal, Starbucks, Walmart, Target, and more!
Swagbucks is totally legit. I use it myself on a daily basis to earn money that I save up for Christmas and birthdays!  I used Swagbucks to pay for a Build A Bear Party & lunch at Red Robin for 10 kiddos and 4 adults in honor of my daughter’s birthday! Thanks to Swagbucks, that’s almost $350 that I didn’t have to spend out of pocket!

How to Resolve Conflict at Work

Conflicts arise at all points in life, and workplace conflict can be just as challenging as any other conflict on your life. It can sometimes be more challenging than conflict with family or friends, because you may not have such an intimate relationship with the people you work with. Many people are afraid of causing negative situations at work, or don’t want to get other people involved. Most of the time, however, not talking about conflict ends up being so much worse for everyone involved. Bottling things up can mean that you become resentful, and it can have a knock on effect on the place where you work, and the environment in which you work, affecting other people, who were not involved in the workplace. There are healthy ways to go about dealing with conflict, and less healthy ways about dealing with it as well. Here is some advice about how to deal with workplace conflict, and how not to deal with it as well. There are some ideas for everyone, so whatever conflict you might be having at work, there is something here for everyone.






A lot of the time, communication can solve the issue at hand. Whether this be with the person directly, or with a superior, if something is affecting your well being, or your ability to work, this is something you have a right to talk about. If it is a small issue, like someone could tweak their working style to make yours easier, something small like this could be mentioned to the person on question, and hopefully they will take this onboard and change for the better. Depending on what the issue is, and the personality of the person, this could be easy or quite challenging.


Don’t Put Up with Disruptive Behaviour


Conflict can sometimes arise by others being abusive, or simply out of line. This kind of behaviour should not be tolerated and you should report them immediately. This can range from sexually inappropriate comments or behaviour, racism, sexism, transphobia, or any other kind of bullying. As adults this should not happen, and you should not have to put up with this. Reporting this is well within your rights, and you should do it. Don’t feel responsible for the consequences, because hopefully they will learn,a dn not treat others the same way on the future. If you put up with it, they will carry on being disruptive and offensive. If it does carry on, don’t be afraid to enquire with a lawyer or criminal defense lawyer. Don’t be afraid to speak up! A lot of the time ignorance can fuel people like this.


Here are just a few ways to tackle conflict in the workplace, so hopefully you have found something useful here that can help solve your conflict. It is always worth doing something about conflict, and simply talking to the person involved, or someone at work can really help the situation. There are lots of ways to resolve conflict, but being honest, kind but constructive, is a good place to start.